Wednesday, March 21, 2012

The Wrist Watch II: Kendall Marshall Update #1,385

According to our crack T.A.H. Research Department, injured North Carolina point guard Kendall Marshall still has a broken wrist, and, by all accounts available to us here at T.A.H. Worldwide Media Headquarters, the sun did, in fact, rise this morning.

According to sources, Marshall went to class yesterday, ate three square meals and slept soundly last night.  The Division of Dreams within the crack T.A.H. Research Department speculates that Marshall dreamed he was a fire-breathing giant who helped his Tar Heels beat Duke by 100 while scoring 30 points and dishing out 20 assists.  

In this very same dream, he also (accidentally - or so it appeared) head-butted Austin Rivers in the mouth (accidentally) and burned down Cameron Indoor Stadium (accidentally?).  

By all accounts, Marshall awoke refreshed this morning and plans to accompany his teammates to St. Louis where his head coach will be inundated by the latest round of “will he play?” questions prior to Friday’s Sweet Sixteen game against the Ohio Bobcats.

Experts in the media and in the blogosphere have pontificated at length about how UNC can’t possibly win without Marshall, but experts here at T.A.H. label those assertions as “crap.”

Stay tuned for a seemingly never-ending series of "The Wrist Watch II: Kendall Marshall Updates"...

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