Monday, December 19, 2011

Dear Mr. Snyder

NOTE: REX's EYES ARE CLOSED, WHICH WOULD EXPLAIN A LOT.
Dear Mr. Snyder

THANKS for the early Christmas present.  Sweeping the Giants for the first time since 1999 added a little more cheer to the Holiday Season. Not quite as good as SWEEPING the Cowboys, but still pretty good.  Maybe the CURSE OF THE DANNY is starting to wane. 

So now our boys – sorry, YOUR boys – are 5-9 with an OUTSIDE shot of winning seven games with two left against the lowly Vikings and the dysfunctional Eagles.  While we might have preferred LOSING out to increase the likelihood of replacing Rex “The Gunslinger With 71.1 Passer Rating” Grossman with a Luck, Barkley or RGIII, over here at T.A.H. Worldwide Media we do have a small WAGER (we presume, with a legal gambling establishment…Dawg???) that the Redskins would, as they say in Vegas, win MORE than SIX games.  (Why can’t they just say SEVEN like everybody else?)

 NICKS (BY WAY OF UNC) HAD A BAD CASE OF THE DROPSIES
Why did we place what now looks to be such a foolish wager when ALL the experts predicted (accurately) that the Redskins would be hard pressed to win SIX games?  Because, like Steve “The Old Ball Coach” Spurrier, we were duped by the preseason performance of the Redskins and we thought that Rex “I Never Met An Interception I Didn’t Like” Grossman would have a better touchdown to interception ratio than his current 1 to 5. OK, it's really 1 to 1.38, but it SEEMS much worse.

The other reason we wagered the Skins could win seven was we believed (now confirmed) that the NFC East was WEAK.  We were wrong about that.  The Giants performance yesterday against the Skins elevated the entire division up to TERRIBLE.  Evidently, even good quarterbacks suffer from temporary blindness and INSANITY while normally sure-handed receivers have days where they cant CATCH a cold.

D'OH!
Oh well, it was a fun game to watch and it does show that the Shenaniganhans can get a group (no matter how injured or untalented) ready to play competently while further SHOWCASING Jim Hasslett’s now very solid defense.

Perhaps we can trade up in the draft to get one of the TOP quarterback prospects.  The Redskins have eight draft picks in next Aprils lottery – one in every round and two in the fourth round.  Of course, we do need linemen, receivers, safeties and the like who aren’t SLOW, HURT, OLD or SMOKING DOPE.

Bring on the Vikings and Christian Ponder!  Nobody EVER loses to a Florida State QB!

Happy Holidays!

Sincerely,
Your Loyal Fan

(Photos by Al Bello/Getty Imates)

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