Monday, March 1, 2010

T.A.H. UNOFFICIAL MASCOT SENT TO REHAB

Speaking of drinking games, our unofficial mascot Zhora the chimpanzee is headed off to rehab after developing a penchant for cigarettes and booze.

Some years ago, T.A.H. adopted/sponsored Zhora via the formerly well-utilized Russian International Chimp Adoption Program. Zhora, a circus performer at teh time, was clearly frustrated by his lack of time in the center ring, and eventually became too aggressive. Ultimately, he was transferred to a zoo in the southern Russian city of Rostov.

According to a popular daily paper there, the Komsomolskaya Pravda, he fathered several baby chimps, learned to draw with markers and “picked up” two vices.

Whoa there, Mr. J. Fred Muggs, just exactly how did our sweet Zhora “pick up” smoking and drinking? Did he sell some of his magic marker art down at the ape art gallery and then take his hard earned cash over to the Chimpanzee convenience store and score a pack of cowboy killers and six pack of Bud? We don’t think so!

Apparently Zhora thought smoking and drinking excessively would help him return to the spotlight in his chosen profession of acting. His consumption increased dramatically after his keepers showed him a series of Mickey Rourke movies.

According to the newspaper, “The beer and cigarettes were ruining him. He would pester passers-by for booze.”

Zookeepers blame zoo visitors for giving Zhora too many “treats.”

Nice, Zhora, NICE!

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