Tuesday, December 1, 2009


The mysterious circumstances of the collision combined with the punning potential of golf have provided plenty of material for internet wits.

Here are ten (OK, eleven) of the funniest Woods jokes posted online so far in no particular order (OK, until the end).

1) Apparently, the only person who can beat Tiger Woods with a golf club is his wife.
2) What's the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.
3) Tiger Woods was injured in a car accident as he pulled out of his driveway early Friday morning. It was Woods' shortest drive since an errant tee shot at the U.S. Open.
4) What was Tiger Woods doing out at 2.30 in the morning? He'd gone clubbing.
5) Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn’t decide between a wood and an iron.
6) Perhaps Tiger should be using a driver?
7) This is the first time Tiger’s ever failed to drive 300 yards
8) Apparently, Tiger admitted this crash was the closest shave he’s ever had. So Gillette has dropped his contract.
9) Tiger Woods wasn't seriously injured in the crash. He's still below par.
10) Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.

Having said that, here’s our favorite bar none…

11) Tiger’s been dropped from the Ryder Cup team as his terrible record of being beaten by the Europeans continues…

With props to the London Times and the Daily Telegraph. Why don’t we have newspapers (or, at least newspaper websites) like this in the U.S.?

(Photo by Bill Frakes/Sports Illustrated and courtesy of TMZ)

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