Thursday, September 24, 2009


According to sources close to T.A.H., a seven-year-old boy was at the center of an Albemarle County courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents, and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody laws requiring that family unity be maintained to the highest degree possible.

The boy then surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents, and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried and said that they also beat him.

After considering the simple fact that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him.

After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the University of Virginia Cavaliers football team, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.
*Items in italics may not be true. But, they may be true in this case.


  1. While the Hoos do in fact suck out loud. They are not as pathetic as that joke which I remember from kindergarten.

  2. Here at T.A.H., we don't disagree with Wade's assement, but when this was forwarded to us yesterday by a Tar Heel (a team that has lost 873 games IN A ROW in C'ville), we thought it worth a chuckle...


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