Saturday, March 17, 2007


No matter, win or lose, Coach K is hard on the recruiting trail. Here's a can't miss kid Krzxcvhgjf4ski almost has locked up. A few more State Farm commercials, and this kid will hand deliver his letter of intent. We're tellin' ya, this guy is gonna make Kevin Durant look like Kwame Brown...


Virginia Tech waited 11 years to get back to the NCAA tournament. Then it took the Hokies more than 39 minutes to find a way to stick around. Deron "Shamrock UpDaButt" McWashington's banked runner in the final minute Friday night helped Virginia Tech rally from a 13-point deficit with just over 8 minutes left and beat Illinois 54-52 in a first-round game in the West Regional.

"It kind of reflects who we are," coach Seth "Potato" O'Greenberg said. "We don't shoot it the straightest, we make easy things difficult. But we just keep on going. We have a resiliency about us." Not to mention those sizzling baggy grey warm up suits. Very Irish indeed.

The winning shot, like this defense-dominated game, was ugly. "I wasn't trying to bank it, but I'll take it," Washington said with a wide grin. (PM 1, THT3 0, TAH-Editor 0). Washington's uncalled bank shot gave the Hokies their first, last and only lead with 47 seconds left on the clock. Why rush into it? Why fess up that you tossed up a rock that turned out to be the game winner?

Illinois (23-12) led by 10 with just over 4 minutes left, but didn't score in the last 4:28 as the Hokies had the last 12 points. The Hokies shot 35% while missing three layups and a dunk. And…as usual…they weren't very good from the free throw line. It's enough to make you want a Guinness for breakfast.

Hey…that's a good idea…

Happy St. Patrick's Day you ever lovin' Hokies! (Don't play like that again!)


Flat on his back after a hard foul, J.R. Reynolds figured he might as well give it a shot. Why not? Everything else was going in. The high-scoring guard with a balky hip made shots from everywhere on the court Friday -- including a just-for-fun fling from his back -- while leading Virginia to an 84-57 victory over Albany in the first round of the NCAA Tournament. Reynolds hit 9-13 shots, 5 of 7 from treyville and 5 of 6 from the charity stripe for 28 points. "You know I practice that 'lay down on the floor on your back' shot at the $130 million John Paul Jones Arena," said Reynolds. "It always goes in, but, oddly enough, every shot always goes in at the $130 million John Paul Jones Arena."

Sean Singeltary made 9 of 15 shots, 2 of 4 from behind the 3 point arc and 3 of 5 from the free throw line for 23 points. That's 51 points between them. Albany only scored 57.

Everything came easy for the Cavaliers (21-10), who advanced in the South Regional with their first tournament win since 1995, when they reached the Elite Eight, and will play Tennessee on Sunday. It was their most lopsided win in 37 NCAA Tournament games.


According to AOL Fanhouse's ACC Basketball Blog, VCU's Wil Fameni broke his nose during the Rams win over Duke Thursday night. This marks the 2nd time in three games that Duke has help break an opposing player's nose. This wasn't totally Duke's fault. Fameni was driving to the hoop when he was fouled by David McClure. When Fameni fell, he went face first into teammate Jesse Pellot-Rosa's knee. Ouch.

According to Coach Anthony Grant said Friday that Fameni was getting fitted for a clear facemask, and is hopeful that it will be ready for the player to wear in time for Saturday's game, which starts at approximately 6 p.m. ET. If the clear mask is not ready, Grant said Fameni will have to wear some other type of protection.

(How is a condom gonna help keep his nose from getting whacked again?)

There was blood all over this game, as Duke's Jon Scheyer received a nice cut to his head.


Chalk, chalk, and more chalk. Fifteen favorites won and Notre Dame lost. Hey, they're a football school, what do ya want? Florida and Kansas cruised. Tennessee lit up Long Beach for 121 points. Tech tried to keep the 5-12 upset pattern going. Texas, Kentucky, Wisconsin got it going in the second half to advance. Third seed Oregon was life and death to beat Miami of Ohio in the only other potential upset of the day.


The boys at /Page2 are at it again. This times it's the NCAA Men's Basketball Touranment All-Hair team. Somehow or another, they left out Michigan senior Brent Petway's now famous cut. Heck, his coach, Tommy Amaker, likes it so much he apears to have just proposed marriage right smack in the middle of senior day at Big Blue. Also, Saluki Jamal Foster's dreads didn't make the cut either. (pun intended). Check it out at:

ESPN2 NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament All-Hair Team


ARE THESE PHOTOS RELATED? LEFT: Hey, North Texas Mean Green guy, nice Sponge Bob SquarePants underwear. RIGHT: Kelvin Sampson just realized he shouldn’t eat tacos for a pre-game meal. FARTHER RIGHT: Hey Brigham Young cheerleader, you’re a mormon. Aren’t you breaking at least two rules? FARTHEST RIGHT: Georgia Tech’s Paul Hewitt just can’t bare to look.

Friday, March 16, 2007


Look, everybody from UNC thinks they hate Duke more than anybody else. Just read Will Blythe’s To Hate Like This Is To Be Happy Forever and you will get a glimpse into the most heated rivalry in basketball from the Tar Heel perspective. If you missed the whole nose thing, our condolences ‘cause your either dead or in a Turkish prison.

Enter Maryland. Some Terps started a very funny web site called Check it out today, the background made me laugh out loud. To say they dog the Blue Devils is an understatement.

Now some more Maryland guys have struck a mighty blow. How do we put this…how about, it’s really, really, REALLY funny. Be forewarned ye office folk, there are a bunch of f-bombs at the beginning that may offend co-workers and/or traumatize/delight young children. As of this morning it had been viewed 144,574 times and even the Duke people think it’s hysterical.

You’ve been warned.

Two words: Home (f$#&ing) run.
Kudos to Dr. A.G. Wahoo who hipped us to this fantastic piece of art.


Thank you, Boston College and VCU. Our guess is VCU didn’t bust up many brackets as lots of folks were betting against Duke. Seems like the media ironically took some delight in their early(?) exit. Here’s a sample of headlines:

"Out-Duked" – Sportsline

"Duke Done Early" – ESPN

"Duke who? It's VCU!" – ESPN

"Coach K-Od" – FoxSports

"Feeling Blue" – MSNBC

"Silenced by the Rams" – SI

"VCU shuffles past Duke, springs first round surprise" - USA Today

"Blue be-Deviled" - Yahoo Sports

"VCU Later" – TSN

We kind of like "Silenced by the Rams." John Scheyer got popped on the eye by a Kobesque follow through by Eric Maynor who made the eventual cold-blooded game winner with 1.8 seconds left in the game. The Sportz Assasin over at AOL FanHouse said this:

“Most everyone didn't miss the irony in this, as a Duke player gets his face bloodied just 11 days after Duke's Gerald Henderson dropped his elbow into Tyler Hansbrough's beak. Hansbrough has been playing with a protective mask ever since. No word if Scheyer will need a mask since ... wait ... I'm getting word that it won't be necessary: Duke's next game isn't for another 7 months.”

That’s rich, he’s stealin’ our stuff!


The #1 seed in the East lost it’s focus for about 10 minutes last night, allowing the undermanned Eastern Kentucky Colonels to outscore them 32-8 and to close to within four. Then coach Roy Williams reminded them that this wasn’t an NBA game, and some tough defense might come in handy. Problem solved, Heels win by twenty. Even though they are no longer true freshmen diaper dandies, they are still pre-school knuckleheads at times. Coach Roy’s sister, Frances Williams Baker, 60, died of Alzheimer's disease on Wednesday. Bummer.


Now there are flops and there are flops, and Duke’s players are well schooled in this art. But this invisble charge is a classic. We believe the proper term would be “air charge.” Check it out:


Central Connecticut State Blue Devils’ head coach Howie Dickenman (yep, that’s his real name) said his players were “terrified” by the pending legal action by the other white Duke. “My guys couldn’t even put their uniforms on they were so scared. They’re all from the Northeast and they know all about New Jersey lawyers and how things ‘get done’. Thanks Duke, thanks a lot.” The other Blue Devils didn’t put up much of a fight losing to top seed Ohio State.

Thursday, March 15, 2007


Attorneys from the firm of Sills, Cummis, Radin, Tischman, Epstein and Gross in Newark, New Jersey, representing the Duke University Blue Devils, are filing suit against the Central Connecticut State University Blue Devils because “their logo copies ours, and it looks silly.” According S. Julian Carr Gross, “We take our Blue Devils quite seriously."

According to Gross, the well known French WWI soldiers Chasseurs Alpins, were nicknamed "les Diables Bleus." (Evidently, they were bad agents, but they were French soldiers, so how bad could they be? Supposedly, they actually won accolades for their courage, but the source of this information is also French, so…) They wore a flowing cape and a jaunty beret that captured the public imagination. Ultimatley, Irving Berlin captured their spirit in song describing them as "strong and active, most attractive…those Devils, the Blue Devils of France." (Here’s a shock, when the U.S. entered the war the Blue Devils left the front and toured the country raising money!)

As the war was ending in Europe, the Board of Trustees lifted its quarter-century ban of football on campus (which explains a lot) and began intercollegiate competition. At first the team was called the Trinity Eleven, The Blue and White or the Methodists. (Not to be confused with the nearby Wake Forest Baptists, which explains why it took Wake until 2006 to get their pigskin house in order). In the fall of 1921, the student newspaper launched a campaign for a "catchy name, one of our own possession that would be instantly recognizable nationwide in songs, yells and publicity." (Nationwide? How presumptuous.) At a campus pep rally it was pointed out that Georgia Tech was gaining recognition as the "Golden Tornados" and that rival North Carolina State College had recently adopted the name "Wolf Pack."

There were numerous nominations including Catamounts, Grizzlies, Badgers, Dreadnaughts, and Captains. Believing a choice utilizing the school colors of dark blue and white to be appropriate, the newspaper editors urged a selection from among the nominations of Blue Titans, Blue Eagles, Polar Bears, Blue Devils, Royal Blazes, or Blue Warriors. (Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the 2001 NCAA Division 1 Men’s Basketball Champions, the Duke Polar Bears…Hmmm, no.)

None of the nominations won strong favor (another shock) but Blue Devils apparently had enough support to elicit the criticism that it would arouse opposition on the Methodist campus "for obvious reasons." The football season passed with no official selection of a name. In 1923, the editors of The Archive and The Chanticleer began referring to the athletic teams as the Blue Devils. Their class had been the first post-war freshmen and the student body was full of returning veterans so the name needed no explanation. Acknowledging that it was somewhat unpopular, they nevertheless believed it to be the best name nominated. (An elitist move if there ever was one!) Neither the college press nor the cheerleaders used the name that first year, but much to the editor's surprise no opposition materialized, not even from the college administration. The Chronicle staff continued its use and through repetition, Blue Devils eventually caught on.

According to Gross, Central Connecticut State U. picked the name Blue Devils "for the sole purpose of belittling Duke." (A move we applaud).

You decide. Here are the profiles of the two schools.

Previous names: Brown School House, Union Institute Academy (Good God! They were yankees way back in 1841), Normal College, Trinity College, Duke University
Namesakes: Washington Duke and Julian S. Carr - powerful and respected Methodists who became wealthy through the tobacco industry and cigarettes that killed people (voluntarily, mind you).
Motto: Eruditio, Religio et Hoopitio (Latin for "Knowledge, Religion and Basketball")
Established: 1838
Endowment: $6.2 billion (Yike!)
Faculty 2,518
Undergraduates 6,244
Postgraduates 5,993
Campus: 8,709 acres
Athletics 26 varsity teams
Number of NCAA Men’s Basketball National Championships: 4
Most Famous alum: Richard M. Nixon, 37th President of the United States and Robert Richardson, Nobel Prize Winner for discovery of superfluidity in helium-3

Namesake: Location
Motto: Get Off The Damn Parkway (English for “Get Off The Damn Parkway”)
Established: 1849
Endowment: $12,359.83 (known on campus as the Emergency Pizza Fund)
Type: Public School
Faculty: 416
Undergraduates: 9,678
Postgraduates: 2,637
Campus: 165 acre
Athletics: 18 varsity teams
Number of NCAA Men’s Basketball National Championships: 0
Most Famous alum: None – well except Fran P. Mainella, Director of the National Park Service 2001 – 2006. William R. “Scar” Scarfotti – Grad student who thinks he’s figured out the superfluidity of helium-2


Last night bubble darling Syracuse beat nobody’s darling Southern Alabama 79-73. The Sun Belt’s Eastern Division regular season champs led the Cuse for most of the first 30 minutes, but the Orange Men got it going in the final 10 minutes to put it away. Props for the new Nike unis (still haven’t seen anybody wear the long sleeved version), and the Cuse wore the alternative ones that said ORANGE on the front. Cool. Also props to Orange Nation which turned out 16,000 strong for a game that has averaged about 4,500 elsewhere. Clemson and Florida State turned out home crowds of 3,500 and the Drexel fans were so offended by the Selection Committee only 2,400 showed up for the NC State game.

So did Syracuse belong in the NCAA? Yes. Did South Alabama belong in the NCAA? Also yes. Yesterday we advocated expanding the Big Dance another 16 teams. We were wrong. (There, we said it. Alert the media.) The NCAA tournament needs to expand by 32 teams. How? Easy.

The NCAA has slightly less money than Bill Gates and slightly more than Mark Cuban. So the NCAA buys the NIT. Cash. Simple as that. In the end who really cares about the NIT as an entity? Answer: The NIT and Madison Square Garden. Keep the pre-season tournament in place – in fact, you might even expand it. Keep the Garden in the rotation. All’s well.

Fold the 32 teams from the NIT into the NCAA Invitational Tournament. Why? Simple. There are 24 teams in the 32 team NIT field with more than 20 wins. It’s a quality field and almost all of the teams could make a good case for being in the Bigger Dance.

The logistics are really pretty simple too. The top 8 seeds in each of the 4 NCAA brackets as they exist now get a bye. The other 32 play the 32 who are currently in the NIT. This happens on Tuesday when the traditional 65 v. 64 game takes place for the side of the bracket that plays on Thursday, and on Wednesday for the side that plays on Friday.

Viola! The tournament is expanded by 32 teams and one full round without changing the dates of the tournament which would impact arenas already selected for future Final Fours, etc. Teams would continue to have great incentives to win in the regular season so they would get a first round bye. The Cinderellas could still get in with a conference tourney win. If a team like N.C. State can play their way in with a ridiculous late run through their conference tournament so be it. If so, they would have to play five games in six days which is exactly what they just did.

Of course, playing one more game would cause tremendous academic trauma to the student athletes, but I’m sure the high and mighty NCAA could come up with some sort of counseling, and/or an investigation to resolve the problem.

Of course, this may be mitigated by the simple fact that one more round of the NCAA tournament will make the regulatory bureaucrats out in Kansas a whole BUNCH MORE MONEY. (emphasis added.)

There. All is right in the world. Anybody got Myles Brand’s number?

Wednesday, March 14, 2007


DURHAM - During yesterday’s “Tuesday’s With K” radio show on XM, University of New Jersey – Durham head coach Mike Krzxyhfbvnsd2ski announced that the Duke “family” was cutting all ties with former Dukie, lawyer, and now ESPN commentator Jay Bilas. Bilas was somewhat critical of his former coach following the Henderson/Hannibalsbrough Nose Incident when Coach K refused to apologize and questioned why Roy Williams still had his star player in the game with just a few seconds left. Evidently, Bilas committed the worse possible sin against his Duke family -- telling the truth.

“He is dead to us now. From now on he will be known as Jay Kill-us,” said Boss Mikey The K. To the horror of some of his listeners, but to the delight of others, Krxydhgx9ski openly admitted that the Duke basketball family did resemble the famous crime organization portrayed on HBO’s prime time drama “The Sopranos.” “Yeah, in many way’s we’re a lot a like that. I like to think of us as the Dukepranos. We are a very tight knit family and you better never forget it! But we aren’t in the ‘sanitation’ bidness like Tone and his fellas.”

Many Dukepranos family members weighed-in on the well publicized riff after Bilas had moved from soldier, to wise guy, to made guy and then all the way up the ladder to consigliere for Boss K. “He’s in the wind now,” said Silvio “JJ” Dante (Trinity College ’71), “I can’t believe that cafone ratted on the Chief Rat, what a mortadello!”

Paulie “Shel” Walnuts (Duke ’69) weighed in saying, “Yeah, he’s a ‘wise guy’ alright, just not my type. He sits up there on that 'EXPM' and he’s a big shot chiacchierone. Whayda puttana!! He should be payin’ Boss K points.”

“Oh, the stugats on dis guy!” said Chistopher “G” Moltisanti (Duke – dropped out 1984), “I’d whack the guy myself, but he’s family and maybe he’s just gira dementa?”

“It’s really a shame, he went to Duke, he played for Duke, he’s part of the Duke tradition, he’s class, he wears great suits, he’s my colleague and one of the best in the business! Oh, my, how the heat gets turned up in March when it’s dance time baby!” said Dickie V (Duke, B.S. Butt-kissing, 1960-2007 - on going studies), “Poor oobatz bastard, buon’anima – God rest his soul, baby!!”

(Editor’s note: Props to Young A.T. for her contributions to this story.)


CHAPEL HILL — Why all the 'coachspeak'? You know we love Ol’ Roy, and he typically has his heart on his sleeve and he’s too honest. But what up with his comments at the ACC Championship post-game press conference when, regarding Psycho T’s masks, he said, “Leave us alone, people are calling us with suggestions, we have it under control and we have good people working on it.” (or something like that)

No, you don’t. The mask was crap and it was giving your leading scorer fits, so why be defensive about it?

Lo and behold, 48 hours later, they are trying something new. The eye-holes of the clear thermoplastic mask he wore during the ACC Tournament have been adjusted, “so hopefully it doesn’t interfere as much” with his vision,’’ head basketball trainer Marc Davis said Tuesday.

Meanwhile, the team has sent a mold of Hansbrough’s face to Detroit, where a specialist will make a different hard plastic facemask for Hansbrough to try (now you’re talking! What, no more Keebler elves, Smurfs or cavemen?). The new mask should arrive in Winston-Salem by the time the team arrives Wednesday, Davis said, and Hansbrough “will try both and see which he likes best.”

Asked how much longer Hansbrough will have to wear a mask, Davis said: “We’re going to evaluate it game-by-game now. If nothing happens, it won’t be much longer.”

(Actual facts courtesy of Raleigh News-Observer: ACC NOW)


WARRENTON - Oh, the whining and crying! Let’s start with Drexel. Here’s how it goes: The NCAA selection committee is a bunch of shills for the power conferences, Drexel is good, Drexel should get in, I can’t believe they left Drexel out, the tourney needs more Davids, fewer Goliaths, Gold Bless the underdog, George Mason for president, blah, blah, blah.

So Drexel loses their conference tournament and gets shuffled off to the NIT and one would presume they have a little bit of a chip on their shoulder. They play at home after a nice nine day rest, and they get punked by a team that has played 5 games in SIX days. Count ‘em, FIVE games in SIX days and they have WON FOUR of ‘em. This from a team that finished 5-11 in a power conference which NCAA selection committee critics say is overrated. A team, that can’t catch a break, a team who’s starting point guard has been hurt much of the season, a team that went home long enough to get clean underwear and head off to Philadelphia for last night’s game.

The Dragons are now 0-5 in the NIT.

Way to go N.C. State.

Which lock for the NCAA tourney will puke next? Maybe those basketball nerds locked in a room for 96 hours with every statistic known to man actually know what they are doing?

Now having said all that, we want to advocate expanding the Big Dance by at least 16 teams, if not 32, and give the top seeds a bye – just like the conference tournies do. Why? Because Florida A&M, among others, shouldn’t keep a team out if they are among the top 64 – like Florida State, which also easily won their NIT opener. We aren’t picking on Florida A&M, they just conveniently make the point – they lost to Maryland 93-54, so you’ll be hard pressed to convince us they’re better than the Wolfpack, Noles or Tigers. It’s great that the little schools can play their way in by winning their conference, but why not expand the tournament so there are 31 automatic bids and 51 at large (instead of 34). Let ‘em play, and we get another week of hoop.

Of course, the idiots at the NCAA will say they don’t want to compromise the student athletes by asking them to play another week. After all, they’ve only been playing basketball since October, so another week will probably cause some kind of academic implosion. Good point.

Our bad. Yesterday while putting the mantel of reality on Old Dominion in an email to CC Nation, we insulted the Marist Red Foxes. Could be because we think famous alum Bill O’Rielly is a tool. Nonetheless, they went into Oklahoma State last night and gave the Cowboys a rare home loss. You want to see a bunch of kids pass the ball like it’s nuclear waste material, check out Marist when they next play N.C.State. Hibachi!

Monday, March 12, 2007


With less than a minute to play and behind by double digits, the University of New Jersey at Durham head basketball coach Mike Krzxyskdhvb3ski was preparing to implement a diabolical plan he had been hatching since his teams first loss to the hated Tar Heels back in February. Knowing the game, the season and the ACC Tournament were pretty much lost, Coach K began to focus on one important statistic (in his mind) – Total ACC Tournament Championships: Duke 16, UNC 15.

With that in mind, Coach K started the plan in motion with the sole motivation of preventing Roy Williams and his choir boy North Carolina Tar Heels from winning the ACC Tournament. During the now infamous time out, Coach K ordered Gerald Henderson to commit a hard foul on Tyler Hansbrough and to aim directly at his nose. K knew that a nose injury would cause the Heels leading scorer to wear the dreaded plastic mask that only NBA star Rip Hamilton seems to have mastered. The handicap, figured His K-ship, would be enough to keep his hated rival from evening up the tournament titles score.

It almost worked.

Hansbrough struggled in his first game with the mask in the opening round of the tournament against Florida State. The talented sophomore followed up that 3-7 shooting, 6 points, 4 rebounds effort with a 4-10, 9 points, 15 rebounds effort against Boston College. Hansbrough, who averages 18.8 points and 8 rebounds per game, finished off the tournament with a 2-6 shooting performance against the Wolfpack in the Championship game.

What Krzmchgydrsl8ski forgot was the simple fact that “the kid,” as Krzuxcnvbg6ski referred to Hansbrough after the nose incident, had spend thousands of hours practicing free throws. That effort paid off as Hansbrough sunk 11 of 11 from the charity stripe as part of a 95.8% free throw shooting effort (23-24) which propelled the Heels over Sidney Lowe’s Wolfpack 89-80 in the ACC Championship game. The victory gave UNC their first tourney title since 1998 and kept the "streak of sevens" alive. The Tar Heels also won the tournament in 1957, '67,’ 77, and 1997.

The Heels shot 57.7% from the field and 60% from behind the three point line and at times it looked like they would run away from the leg-weary, four-games-in-four-days Wolfpack. But mid-way through the second half, the boys from Raleigh found their 19th wind and scored every possession from the 8:24 mark until there was 2:20 left in the game. From there it was a free throw shooting contest, and UNC won. (Take note Virginia Tech and Clemson).

Local product Ty "Me A River" Lawson, from Clinton, MD via Virginia's Oak Hill Academy, gets much of the credit for delivering the victory. Roy Williams' "Run, Run, Run and Run Some More" offense needs a good quarterback, and recently the light bulb went off for young Lawson who plays the point guard position with such speed it's easy to miss his moves.

Rumor has it that Coach K was bitterly disappointed, telling the Duke Chronicle, “I had nothing to do with the kid’s injury, but if I did, and I didn’t, but if I did…and, of course, I didn’t, it almost worked.”

For further enjoyment re: Coach K, check out The Monday Krzyzewski Column at

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