Thursday, November 15, 2007

SHAQGATE UPDATE

Legal wrangling over the Hume, VA (a suburb of Warrenton for you out-of-town folks) winery currently operated by Oasis Vineyard Inc., is slated to continue in Fauquier County Circuit Court Nov. 27.
The issue is selling the vineyard. "Prior to the acceptance of the Tuscan Shaq? Ventures, LLC contract, Tareq Salahi made an offer to purchase the vineyard which was not accepted," Legal Eagle Hall of Fame member P. Morrison said in the emergency motion on behalf of his client.

"The Defendant intends to present evidence that his contract should be accepted rather than the Tuscan Shaq? Ventures, LLC contract, or, in the alternative, that the terms of the Tuscan Shaq? Ventures, LLC contract are not in the best interests of the corporation, or as an alternative to the alternative a tort based contract excluding Tuscan Shaq? Ventures, LLC from drinking Shiraz, or, in the alternative, an injunctive passive future perfect prerogative barring Tuscan Shaq? Ventures, LLC from proceeding in anyway…just to be clear," said Morrison.

The court appointed T.H. Thorpe III as receiver of Oasis Vineyard Inc., in June. In a report filed in circuit court, THT3 described operation of the winery as "contentious." He also probably said “contentious as s&#%,” but that was off the record.

"There was an ongoing battle between Tareq Salahi and [his parents] Dirgham and Corinne Salahi for control of operation of the vineyard which led to numerous visits by the Fauquier County Sheriff's Office," THT3 reported. According to Legal Eagle Morrison, “We can neither confirm nor deny the presence of the Fauquier County Sheriff’s office at Oasis, but we are blessed to have them just the same.”

Since litigation began last November, allegations of fraud and embezzlement of corporate assets have been made by both parties.

Thorpe said he initially determined that Tareq Salahi should be allowed to operate the winery "for the time being," but that he changed his mind when it became apparent that "the winery must be sold due to the fact that the current situation was absolutely unsustainable."

“So all this s&#% is this Thorpe dudes fault,” said Shaq wishing to remain anonymous.


Legal Eagle Morrison said, “I love my main man T, but that’s bulls#%&! My client is the only person that can effectively run the operation. Period. Well, on second thought, Nordini temporarily needs something to do...”

“Pass the Merlot,” said a seven-foot plus African-American man who claimed not to be Shaq.

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