Monday, October 22, 2007

WHO DOESN'T LIKE CRAZY PEOPLE?

...and who is crazier than our main man and litigation machine Jonathan Lee Riches? You remember Jonathan? He sued Mike Vick for selling his dogs on E-bay, and for being in cahoots with Middle Eastern terrorists. Evidently, he also sued Bill Belichick for putting a spy camera in Donovan McNabb's soup. (Really...who could make that up?)


Now he's after Perez Hilton, Isiah Thomas, and George Steinbrenner.

His latest complaint has nothing to do with alleged copyright infringement, defamation, or leaked Britney Spears songs. Instead, Perez Hilton (real name: Mario Lavandeira) is the latest public figure to be sued by kooky Jonathan Lee Riches...

According to Riches, he carried on a years-long sexual relationship with Hilton and once bought the blogger a $23,000 diamond ring (which he presented to Hilton at a Holiday Inn in Cheyenne, Wyoming). Riches, jailed in South Carolina on federal fraud charges, claims that he pulled his swindles to pay for gifts and travel for him and Hilton. As with all of his previous lawsuits, Riches' complaint against the blogger is filled with amusing pop culture references and scores of bizarre claims. Riches is seeking the closure of Hilton's popular web site, which he claims is invading his privacy and putting his life in danger...

Here's some pearls from some of his other endeavors:

“I have known Defendant Steinbrenner since 1988 when I was a 12 year old boy. I met Steinbrenner at St. Roman Catholic church in Philadelphia, PA in back of the Alter. We exchanged telephone Numbers. Steinbrenner would send me candy bags with blow pops and tootsie rolls and gay comic books. Steinbrenner told me to call him "Daddy Steinbrenner" and not to tell anyone.”

...and...

“I've known Isiah Thomas since 1993 when he played basketball for the Detroit Pistons. I lived near Coatesville Pennsylvania where current NBA guard for the Detroit Pistons Richard "rip" Hamilton" is from. We all used to play basketball pickup games at CASH Highschool on Rt. 30. This is where I had my first encounter sexually with Isiah Thomas around October 1995. After a pickup game, Isiah Thomas took me in back of some porta potties and began French Kissing me. He pulled out $1,000 dollars and told me not to tell my mother and he will continue to send me money in return of him sending me love letters.”

Someone get this guy a blog...please. Steinbrenner told him to call him daddy! Oh, man, he's killin' us...
Gay comic books? Make it stop...

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