Monday, April 2, 2007


Capital One, which has become a household name via several variations of its memorable "What's in your wallet?" ad campaign, is about to release a new campaign for tonight's NCAA final.

If you think you're seeing those Capital One ads all the time, you are. Capital One spent $5.4 million on ads in January, according to Nielsen Monitor-Plus. That's more than rivals Visa and MasterCard or American Express. So it was only natural that the very successful “What’s in your wallet?” campaign would evolve (or devolve, depending on your perspective) into “Who’s in your wallet?” – a new campaign starting who else? Mike Krzcchfhgbndm8ski, of course.

“Capital One has spent over $285 million a year on our advertising campaigns,” said company spokesperson Bill McDonald (Duke ’71), “And we are happy to "borrow" Coach K from American Express. What better way to spend our money than paying off ACC officials to benefit Duke basketball and honoring Leader/Boss K in the process with more exposure to potential recruits? Of course the first commercial in the new ‘Who’s in your wallet?’ series will also feature Tom Lopes, John Cahill, Mike Kitts, the guys who reffed the ClockGate game earlier this year at Clemson. They deserve some ‘Andy Warhol time’ on the positive side.”

Unfortunately, while Capital One is throwing around big ad dollars, they’re still getting dissed on Madison Avenue: "The work is relentlessly insipid," says Ernest Lupinacci, a partner at Anomaly in New York. "Can anybody relate to Hagar the Horrible trying to slit your throat when you pull out a credit card? No. But surely everybody understands that Mike Krzchvaskds8ski has the officials in his pocket. Besides we all want to scream obscenities at our children and our co-workers the way Krzyxhflkpy7ski does!”

Consumers surveyed for Ad Track, USA TODAY's weekly poll, say that, of those familiar with the ads, 79% agree that Coach K is up to no good and it has something to do with somebody’s wallet. The numbers peak at 99% in certain regions of central North Carolina, Maryland and Virginia while running at an unbelievably low 2% in Durham, NC and most of New Jersey.

Needless to say this has generated a bit of an uproar over at American Express where, according to, the Mighty K is about to roll out a new Duke Blue Cash AE card. The campaign goes like this: “Insipire, Motivate, Manipulate. Introducing Duke Blue Cash. Now earn more reward points for the things that are important to you. Landrovers for your Boozer’s and Duhon’s. Free meals for your Battier’s and Deng’s. Hookers for your Dunleavy’s and Redick’s. Cigars for your Bilas’s (who knew they were back on good terms?) and Vitale’s. Hitmen for your Duke-biased refs.” A spokesperson for American Express called the campaign, “Understated, but perfect.”

Both commercials will debut during CBS’s coverage of tonight's game. CBS analyst Billy Packer will provide a 30 second infomercial lead-in to the new “Who’s in your wallet?” spots declaring that the Final Four, CBS, Cap One and Coach Krzyscvgkbm9ski are all “in your head and your wallet!” This will mark the first time Packer has said anything other than super serious basketball analysis since he started covering the Final Four in 1975.

Coach Kryzsfkdr5ski could not be reached. Sources close to the Blue Devils said he was visiting recruits at a Utah commune and an Idaho juvenile corrections facility (fancy words for prison). (Oh no! More skinny white guys?)

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